The one where I get out of dishes for a while.

My ability to injure myself is a bit overdeveloped. Just this morning I decided the burn I sustained during my polymer clay frenzy was healed enough to go without bandage. Little did I know it would be replaced with a new one a few hours later.


This bandage has a serious injury under it, and it is sure to elicit questions. Do I tell the real story or make one up? I think I will evade questions, and you dear blog readers will know the truth.

You see our commode has been leaking and dear hubby was going to fix it this morning. Knowing that, did I go to bathroom at church before I came home? No, not that it would have mattered. I have this mechanism that means I walk through my front door and the bladder twitches. So after being home long enough to peel potatoes for lunch I cannot stand it anymore. I am thankful we live in the country and have as secluded part to the backyard. While I am taking care of business the dog starts heading toward me, as I shoo him off I lose my balance slightly and flail my arms to catch my balance. In the flailing I slap a pane of unbroken glass near me with the knuckle of my right hand middle finger. Didn't break the glass but cut my finger. I gingerly try to put myself back together to get in the house so as to not stain my dress with my now dripping finger. I get in the house and put my hand under running water to clean it off I scream it really hurt, which brings my husband running from the bathroom. As I inspect the cut and see it is quite deep and quite wide and notice white things inside, he nearly passes out, he doesn't do blood and guts.

My brother the EMT comes out and butterflies it for me, tells me it needs stitches. However I am cheap and decide that isn't necessary. Then as I end up explaining the whole story to my mother, father, brother and sister I realize I need a covers story. Can I really admit to people that I had to micturate in my own yard and then nearly sever a finger on something that doesn't belong in my yard so the dog doesn't lick my bare butt in the process?

Typing is slow, writing impossible, I am wondering how I will fix my hair. I have decided I will have my dad help me rebandage it to keep my husband from having more spells. And the toilet is leaking from the tank now after dear hubby put it all together again. However I can just turn off the valve and we will deal with that after he does the dishes. At least we are still laughing about it.