Getting things out of my head.

I have three things whirling about in my head right now lets see if I can connect them all in a way that makes sense.

#1 What kind of blog is my blog? I had found a blog listing thing called Momsdotcom. I threw my name in the ring, they wanted to know where I fit in. I don't really know. While I am not opposed to mommy blog, that is obviously not my only topic. Nor is it crafts, relationships, gardening or whatever I choose to blog about. Probably one of the reasons I am not commercially successful at blogging, but that is not really why I do it either. (That last comment is tongue in cheek, I would take the money, but I am not willing to do what it takes to get it either.)

#2 There was a category for Christian blogs or Christian moms, again something I don't hit on in every entry, but I am a Christian. Honestly while, I feel like my faith is stronger than ever, I am hesitant sometimes about hitting my readers about the head with it. I know I have a diverse group who do not believe the same as I. Sometimes I wonder if that is an excuse.

#3 Spiritually I find myself at a branching point. While we are growing, we are having to find ways to mix the old with the new a lot lately. One of the advantages and reasons we moved was to start over. In particular my husband felt like he needed to be separated from some things that were destructive in his life. Lately we have had several opportunities to be with old friends, who I hold dear, but I worry about him missing his old life when he is with them. For a long time he wanted to escape reality with them instead of come home to wife and two kids. I think we have moved past that but the specter of it happening again makes my gut churn.

#4 There are certain two people in my life, whom I will not name, who bicker a lot and I often feel caught in the middle. Today was a prime example of them both assuming the worst of each other and bickering about what they think the other one means or wants. I love them but want to shout, BE THE HERO, let it go and just listen, give them the benefit of the doubt, you could be good friends, without all the drama. (If you are one of those two people and you happen to read this remember I love you both.)

In conclusion, I think I should take my advice from #4 there and apply to to #3 and try and find a way to discuss this with my hubby instead of assuming it will cause a big fight. And maybe find a way to better employ #2 in my life in a more outward way. I have been neglecting my bible study and after taking the time to do it today, I can feel more confident that we will get through this bump too, we have to face these issues sometime. #1 will probably never be resolved, I don't see myself sticking to any one topic for long.

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Wildfire

As I mentioned in a previous post, we are having a particularly dry year here in Southern NM. Wildfires are happening nearly daily since we have some thunderstorms blowing through and lightening strikes are common. I wish those same storms would drop some rain. To be safe the national forests nearest to us are closed to the public, big signs plaster the stores on the way out of town that leads up to the mountains. Lincoln National Forest Closed, NO Campfires, NO picnics, NO offroading, Trails closed.

This is a picture of the Organ Mountains in Las Cruces, my other hometown, burning last week.The fire is now contained.

We had planned on taking a camping trip this summer, escaping the desert heat, but we will have to wait and see if they are open after the monsoons. We even thought of "camping" at our house, but I am fearful of having a fire here. We are surrounded by 100+ acres of dry brush and a plenty of things to burn. A stray ember or spark could be pretty dangerous. I guess I could have my dad standby with a fire truck.

My dad and brother are both volunteer fireman and have been very busy the past few weeks. Last week they responded to a call and ended up staying at a ranch for a few days with the Rocky Fire. Out of cell phone range, and "requested" to stay there by a government entity to protect that line if the wind blew the fire their way, it gave us a little consternation about their safety. My mom felt better once they took some of my dads medicines out to him. I think he has been to brush fire every day since they came back from that fire.

When I hear the world wildfire, I tend to think of three things, California, a Michael Martin Murphy song (also a New Mexican by the way) and Smokey Bear.



Did you know that Smokey Bear is a New Mexican? Just in case you are wondering his official title is Smokey Bear, not Smokey the Bear. He was found as a cub in 1950 in Capitan, NM after a wildfire. Burned badly he was taken to Santa Fe and treated and then was offered as symbol of fire prevention to the Forest Service and spent his life at the National Zoo. You can read the story here.

The Art of being Crafty

Crafty

adj. craft·i·er, craft·i·est

1. Skilled in or marked by underhandedness, deviousness, or deception.

2. Chiefly British Skillful; dexterous.

Recently a post came through on the polymer clay group I joined about whether we are crafters or artists. Personally I don't have a problem with the term crafty. In fact being crafty has paid off for me this week.

Example #1.

I have a bed of squash and melons coming up for the second time. The first time the squirrels made it through my defenses. This time so far so good, I even have one plant that is growing big. While I would like to think it is all due to my superior, squirrel abatement skills, I think this guy might be helping me out. Instead of being horrified and killing it when I spotted him laying near my melon bed, I obviously went and got the camera. Don't get too freaked out boys and girls, this is a bull snake, not a rattler, not too big only about three feet. I am glad to have him or her around, squirrels beware. I feel like definition number one here, luring innocent watermelon hungry squirrels to their death, but I am okay with that.

Example #2
Being skilled with ones hands means you have lots of things to give away to your friends and family. Sometimes you are the lucky recipient of such gifts. Hyperher, is a crafty lady, and she very sweetly send me this bag this week as a belated birthday present. Please join me in telling her how much she rocks. YOU ROCK, and definitely fall into category #2 there. Please don't drool on your keyboard as you look at the picture.

Example #3

Giving away those crafty items can be so rewarding in unintended ways. I mentioned in my last post about making a scrapbook for my cousin going to Princeton for the summer. My aunt, her mother, has had a hard time of it of late. Her son is in Iraq, her mother passed away in February and now her daughter got on a plane today and flew for the first time in her life, across the country, alone. In fact she had not been speaking to my mom, over some of the arrangements for my grandmothers estate. My mother has been very worried about her sister, she felt like the emotional stress of those situations was causing the problem. In fact we had a going away party for the cousin that they did not attend. However when she saw the silly scrapbook I made at my mom's request for her daughter, she called crying and they are reconciled. I would have never expected some silly crafting to be the catalyst for that.

So upward and onward. These are my last batch of beads waiting to be sanded and buffed. I have great hope for them. Maybe they can instill world peace. ; )

Because Awesomeness is Free

I have two cousins born my senior year of high school, they have chagrined me by turning 17 this year. However tonight I feel as though I have some measure of revenge on them. (Why do I need revenge? I don't know, because they are teenagers and need teasing.)

My mother asked me to make a small scrapbook to send with one of them as she is leaving home next week to attend Princeton for the summer, she was selected to part of a summer program there before her senior year. I have been looking for the best photos and thinking of snarky comments to include, because that is how one makes scraping fun, plus the point is to help her NOT be homesick. However sometimes you just can't orchestrate events better than real life with throw at you.

Earlier today one of the cousins my age asked if we wanted to join them to go to the movies and see Kung Fu Panda. He invited his sister, brother and kids, I invited my brother and kids, before you know it we have almost two full rows of theater seats taken up. (It is only 9 across before you get freaked out.)

As luck would have it, although we have a two screen megacineplex, there was only one choice tonight. Technical difficulties shut down Zohan. Apparently our theater isn't high enough wattage for Sandler. So one my poor unsuspecting teenage cousins shows up after the previews have started and sits in front of us, her poor date seemed a little startled by two full rows of cousins behind them, as was she.

Seriously we are a motley bunch, would you want these guys behind you on a date?

Tag, your it.

Fabiola tagged me last week.

1.What was I doing 10 years ago ?

• Moving from an upstairs (not close to the parking lot, i.e. moving van) apartment in Tucson, Arizona 110F to Las Cruces, NM 105F. Holy crap that was hot long few days, at least it is a dry heat. : -)
  

2.Five things on my to do List?

1. Sort Laundry
2. Clean kitchen floor
3. Vacuum carpet
4. Clean the bathroom
5. Finish scrapbook for smarty pants going to Princeton cousin.
   

3.Snacks I enjoy?

• Chocolate, dark.
• tortilla heated on gas flame with cheese & some salsa on top
  

4.Things I would do if I was a Millionaire?

• Give some money to charity;
• Buy my own villa with guest houses for my friends to visit, a large greenhouse that could house my avocado & lime trees, grow chile, tomatoes, onions & agave. Guacamole, salsa & margaritas for everyone by the pool.
  
• Take a trip around the world.

5.Places I have lived?

• Artesia, NM
  
• Las Cruces, NM
  
• Lawrence, KS
  
• Tucson, AZ
  
• Ruidoso, NM
  

Feel free to particpate if you like...

Does this upset you?

1. International Breastfeeding Symbol Pendant Necklace, 2. Mary Cassatt painting Breastfeeding Pendant, 3. Renoir Breastfeeding Pendant Necklace, 4. Dalou Breastfeeding Pendant Necklace, 5. Mary Cassatt Drawing Breastfeeding Pendant Necklace, 6. Solario Breastfeeding Pendant Necklace, 7. Solario Breastfeeding Pendant Necklace, 8. sling baby, 9. mama


First I want to recognize the artist who created these lovely pendants. She has an etsy store, Such Pretty Colors and a website, and you should be able to access her flickr photo set from the credits under the photos. She also has a blog, I found these pendants a while back searching on how to make polymer clay photo pendants. (Which I still have not mastered by the way.)

Second, I wonder why these images bothers so many people. I am sure most of us have heard of Facebook removing pictures of breastfeeding mothers because it violates their terms of use. Myspace does this as well, according to one of my friends who had a complaint filed and a picture removed this week. The photo in question was an oil painting not unlike some of those pictured here. (I should note I have accounts on both sites.)

Personally I have seen much more offensive photos of scantily clad girls who want to be my friend so they can spam me to death about visiting their porn site, or help me learn how to make money.

As a mother, who breastfed both of my boys, I am well aware of the opposition to breastfeeding. For the life of me, I don't get it. If I had dime for every time someone said something chastising to me like I don't have a problem with it unless, they can chew real food, ask for it, walk, I could have bought formula. Except I didn't want to, I was lazy and cheap and washing bottles and buying formula seemed stupid to me. Of course I was lucky enough to stay home or work part time both times for the first year.

I am more shocked by the discouragement most hospital nurses give to breastfeeding. I was discouraged with my first. The second time around the nurses didn't give me any guff, God bless them, because I was loaded for bear if they had even whispered to me about formula. I can easily count on both hands friends who have been outright discouraged, have been chastised and generally given a hard time about it. I had one daycare director, actually suggest to me that if I insisted on breastfeeding, I should pump it and feed it from a bottle so I knew exactly how much he was getting. She told me she disapproved of breastfeeding, I thought that was especially sad since she was the director of a grads program at a high school, and was in charge of helping guide the teen mothers.

One of my most angry moments was using a tucked away breastfeeding nook at our local mall on day, completely covered, I am not the bare all type of girl, and getting ugly looks from the mall walkers. I was very pissed me off, they saw the signs, they could have not walked around the booth.

I know breastfeeding isn't for every mom, since work or medical issues often prevent it. However I feel like social pressure should never be the reason. I don't know why I was so adamant about it, since other than one girlfriend, I knew no one else who was doing it. It wasn't a tradition in my family. However the possible benefits for my child seemed, to outweigh any misgivings I might have had. I can see why painters through the ages have chosen to document it, I still have fond memories of my babies, suckling, staring intently at me with a tiny hand curled around my fingers.

I think it is sad the female breast is so sexualized in this country that is the only use we can see for it, and not for the other reason God made them.

Mundane Moments

Do you find the most beautiful moments in life are sometimes the most mundane?

Every once in a while we are doing the dumbest thing and I just marvel at how great life is.

Yesterday I had one of those moments. The washer quit agitating, which was quite agitating really. So Ben took the bottom off to take a look at it. At one point he had it needed my help to check something out. So here we are on a Saturday afternoon sitting in our hall working on the washer and just hanging out. I couldn't help but think a few years ago, my husband didn't fix anything, much less attempt to. A few years ago I would have been mad, upset and worried about what I was going to do without a washer, since buying a new one right now is not an option. A few years ago this would have been cause for a bunch of drama.

I am so glad our lives changed for the better. It's moments like those, that make me realize how far our faith and marriage have evolved over the last few years. Not that we don't have our moments, because we certainly do, they are just a lot less often. I need to remember and thank God everyday for restoring my family, and making it better than it was before the problems started.

I am From...

I found this meme over at Life from My Laptop. She got the inspiration from this blog, Fragments from Floyd, who got it from the poem Where I am From by George Ella Lyons. Fragments from Floyd has a good template if you want to use it to do your own.

I am from dusty horses, from Dr. Pepper and watching too much Beau and Luke in my youth.



I am from clear blue sky, dry desert, watch where you step, sharp pokes that harbor small spots bright colors.



I am from creosote that smells like rain, old barns with weathered gray wood rough to the touch full of rugged charm.



I am from great grandfather farmers with fields of watermelons, hot chile and sweet smelling alfalfa.



I am from apron strings, bread baking, biscuit making, can I get you some iced tea mom. I am from a junk fixing, large and scary but soft as a teddy bear, hold you till the hurt goes away daddy.



I am from Jesus loves me, the old rugged cross, I'll fly away Baptist traditions I have returned to. I am from smart allec, laugh a lot, rough around the edges, but fiercely loving meet at Nanny's house after church bring the banana pudding Aunt Brenda.



I am from make mine christmas enchiladas, a relleno on the side, frijoles and tortillas warmed over the flame on the gas stove. Mija where you been? ask the moms of friends.



I am from small town where everyone makes the front page, friday night football, 4-H fairs, two steppin' cowboys don't line dance, starched pants, ropers and show steers with their held raised high.



I am from thistle, pipes and clansmen back to Stirling of old from my da. I am from moonshine, ornery men and a preachers daughter and who knows where from my ma.



I am from yellow Polaroids with messy hair, star wars t-shirts, freckled face with big goofy grin stored in clingy magnetic paged albums a tomboy looking back trying to find her own style and grace.