It's only logical

Max is almost completely out of all toddler like activities these days. He is potty trained, but not accident free. He is mostly reasonable, but still can throw a wallop of a fit, albeit less frequently. Suddenly he protects his two year old little cousin rather than fight with her. Next month my baby will be four, and I love how our conversations go these days, even though sometimes I don't come out on top.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Me to Max: Max can you hold the dustpan for Nonnie like you do for mommy?

Max: No, I only do that for my mommy.

Me: Max, remember Nonnie is my mommy, so it is okay, almost just like doing it for your mommy.

Max: You do it for her then, she's your mommy.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

I took him clothes shopping with me the other night. Without big brother to wrestle with, he was quite helpful and sat nicely on the bench in the changing room while I tried a few clothes on. First outfit a pant suit, he made sure I was putting it on correctly, Does that shirt get tucked in mom? When I explained it stayed out, he exclaimed, It is beautiful mommy! After trying on a dress, he proudly said Mom that looks like a wedding dress, you are pretty. But the winner, was when I tried on a sparkly red and black shirt and he yelled excitedly Mommy you look like a rock star! I bought the shirt and wore it to the Symphony the next night, and every time someone complimented it, I had to tell them about my personal shopper.

Hey Look at Me I am a Big KId Too!

Did you know I have two boys? I kid, sometimes I feel bad, Z does get the lions share of the attention lately. He's in school and sports, sometimes little brother feels a bit left out. For the last few weeks he has been desperately wanting to be big and go to kindergarten with brother.

In fact he informed that he was five now and old enough to go. When I asked, You are? He told me that he had a few extra birthdays I didn't know about. After relating that story to a womens group at church I found out a few senior saints have apparently been trying to give their extra birthdays away to the toddlers. Sneaky, aren't they? I knew those white hairs couldn't be trusted.

In reality he will probably be attending Headstart this fall, so he will get to go to school. I don't have his letter yet, but a recent speech difficulty diagnosis most likely will ensure him a spot. I didn't take the diagnosis too hard though because he is as smart as a whip. He was very communicative with the diagnostician, and knew every question she asked, I guess it was the way he said his words, I am just used to deciphering for him.

Right now I am enjoying my extra time with him, it has been fun the last few days. The little chatter box keeps the day lively with his running commentary. Today we looked at butterflies, tarantula hawks and caterpillars. One man, whom we saw in a parking lot after Max had captured a long green larvae dared called it a worm, under his breath Max said, it's not a worm, it's a caterpillar. I think the duh was implied. (That is my little entomologist in training!)

While he had said infamous things like telling my mom what is under my pants, he can be quite profound at times for a three year old. Take Sunday at lunch, as we cracked fortune cookies, I asked him to read mine. Although he cannot actually read, his acting was dead on when he looked at the paper and* stated this, If you do the right things and then do it, you will be happy.

Sounds to me like he has it down, I don't even think the little genius needs school.


*I changed my original wording here, because I unintentionally made it sound like he can read, which he cannot. He is smart but not that smart, he is only three.

My secret is out

Have you ever thought that men get listened too better?

For instance there have been times I took a man along with to tell another man something just because I wanted to be heard. Like when taking in a car to repair, if a man says tells another man the horn honks every time you turn right, he believes it. When a woman says it, we must be joking.

We used to do experiments with one boss. One woman would make a suggestion and he would shoot it down. Then a few days later we would send a guy in with the same suggestion, he would go for it. We tried it many times and different ways while we all really liked the boss, he obviously put more stock in it when a man said it. This prompted my coworker Barb to lament that she needed a penis to be heard. You know we we gave her plenty of symbolic peni (plural?) over the years to try and help her out.

While I think I have worked on the technique and after years of working more with men than women, I think I know how to make myself heard. Maybe I have been just fooling myself, though my son has outed me, and apparently I could make Barb jealous.

The following story will surely bring up lots of questions. I should make it a point to tell you we do practice modesty in this house, but we only have one bathroom, and sometimes things are seen. In any case, I hope it gives you a good laugh.

Recently my mother was watching four of her grandchildren one night while we went out and had good times. She gave them all a bath before bed. My youngest, Max age 3, was concerned about his younger girl cousin lacking a certain appendage. My mother tried to explain to him that girls do not have a penis. She further elaborated saying she didn't and his momma didn't. WHOA, stop right there, Nonie. He got very angry and informed her that his mother did too have a penis, it was just really small.